So Am I a Genius or Just Plain Lazy?

Adventures With A Very Large Chaise

The Prof and I scored a monstrous, uber comfortable chaise off Craig's List some years back. His Royal Highness wants more room in his office so the chaise had to go. We had two choices:

  1.  Get rid of it ("but it's soooooo comfortable")
  2. Park it in the yard like some poor trailer-park yazoos who feel indoor furniture works outdoors!

I kinda took a wee liking to point number 2 above. YEEHAH! Imagine this:

Photo of a tacky couch in a run-down front yard.

Now we're talkin'!

HOWEVER.

The Prof has family a-comin' fer a visit, so's we gotta levitate our minds outta that cesspool. I 'recken The Prof doesn't wanna scare off his kinfolk. So I gits it in my noggin' to cover the dang thing so's it looks respectable out back like some purdy piece of high-falootin' spensive patio furniture that look like it t'were meant ta be there and not a trashy substitute. But.

ARGH! I'm not wanting to slip cover that monstrosity! I'm short on time. I don't wanna sew. I wanna snap my fingers and have it done. Quickly. On a budget.

Enter the fabulous drop cloth and all the necessary supplies.

Photo of supplies used for the project laying on this huge chaise. Supplies include a staple gun, safety pins, a large drop cloth and a wine bottle. Yes. Wine bottle.

Yep. Wine. Good pain killer in case the staple gun goes awry or a cat gets trapped under the cloth and fangs his way outta there with all ten claws a churnin'.

P.S. I'm so envious of those blogs with tutorials in which they show the supplies they used for their DIY projects and show step by step instructions. They're all over Pinterest and YouTube. Sigh. Maybe one day I'll join the big leagues.

A very large chaise with drop cloth partially draped over it.
I am a heavy beast capable of cradling you into deep sleep.

Chaise partially covered but still have to cover two big cushions.

Things started getting a little blurry 'bout now. Staple gun musta gone awry and I 'reckin the wine came inta play.

Real life cat, Wally, laying belly-up on the drop cloth impeding progress for sure.

Wally tried to ply me with his feline wares. But I remained strong and steadfast!

Wally sprawled across a cushion in progress. His gentiles are covered with a purple circle with the word YIKES! inscribed inside.

Glory be!

The Chaise is almost done! Only a pillow at the back needs to be covered.

I am almost done! AND.

No sewing machines were harmed in the making of this DIY project!

Still got me more staples to shoot in the dang thang and loose ends to tie up. Then I hose her down with fancy dirt and water repellant.

Photos to follow of it's purdified placement on the fancy lookin' patio out back.

Dang I love faking it. Just don't look under anything. Not the cushion. Not the whole chaise. The presentin' part is purdy but the under-belly 'ain't so sweet.

Don't know if'n I'm a genius or just plain lazy.

By the way, is it just the wine talkin' or does that dang pillow look like a cat?

Photo of the almost finished chaise but the back pillow does indeed look like a cat head and there are eyes, a nose and mouth drawn in to prove it.

9 thoughts on “So Am I a Genius or Just Plain Lazy?

  1. Candie

    Looks great to me, cat fur and all. But, now I know why my plans for re-covering furniture never go as expected. I forgot the wine!!

    Reply
  2. BJ

    You is a genius, 'cause that chaise came out oh-so-purdy! Who gives a hoot about the under-belly part?
    Can't wait to see it in all it's beautiousness on your patio. As far as the pillow looking like a cat, I do reckon the wine was a talkin' to you just a smidge!

    Reply
    1. The Kreatrix

      Post author

      The Chaise is still parked inside the house 'cause the dang back patio is still under construction. Don't wanna dirty the purdy new fangled chaise. Trouble is, the kitties think the chaise is a permanent fixture right where it sits and dagnab if they don't think it's a scratchin' post and a sleepin' post. Lil' varmits. Good thank ah lovem.

      Reply
    2. The Kreatrix

      Post author

      I reckon the wine kept talkin' ta me cause that dang pillow started lookin' like a lizard. Then I started carin' bout the underbelly parts and thinkin' I was cheatin' by not makin' the durn thing purdy all the ways around. Shoot. Life's a bowl of doody.

      Reply
  3. Stu

    I say your a genius! I am also from LA (as in Lower Alabama...seriously). If you ever git tired of all dem dar deadlines, you com' on down South where you can be one of those highfalutin interior designers!

    Reply
  4. The Kreatrix

    Post author

    Yep. Eye's a genius fer sure. Seein' as we share livin' in a sort of LaLa land, we kin keep each other's spirits up. Highfalutin interior designers make me go areachin' for da moonshine. I like to have me some bits o' mystery with all kinds of dark underbellies not suitable fer ta average folks. Just sayin'...

    Reply
  5. Taylor

    HAHA! Love this. Just noticed the sofa in that photo is hanging like a swing. Niiiiice. Know what you mean about the tutorials. I love them but sometimes I just gotta roll my eyes. Going to try the wine thing with my next diy project.

    Reply
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